Impedence

This is a situation that is very similar to a set of passive speakers which have an impedence of 4Ohms
Rated at 25w each
Involved with an audio amplifer which has an impedence of 8Ohms
Output of 100w
It will not work correctly
In all likelyhood the speakers will infact, malfunction
This would not happen
If the instructions were followed to the letter
and the system were set up thusly:
"The speakers and the amplifer should have a matching impedence and wattage value"

This is a situation that is very similar to an internal combustion engine that is tuned to run on diesel
Rated at 98Bhp
Involved with an inept fuel insertion operative, also known as a driver
Output of 38hours per weeek
It will not work correctly
In all likelyhood the operative will infact, insert petrol into the fuel tank
This would not happen
If the instructions were followed to the letter
and the system were set up thusly:
"Never put petrol into a diesel vehicle, and vice versa"

You are Mine

You are 1000 wasted office hours when the server crashes
You are the dull headache from staring into a monitor in a darkened room
You sap the joy out of life just by lighting up peoples eyes
You are mine

You are the frustration involved in a complicated piece of software engineering
You are the coffee spilt into the cracks in the keyboard, causing the function of the keyboard to be nullified
You are the mouse wheel that no longer scrolls in only one direction
You are mine

You are the stress created from missing a deadline by a mere few seconds
You are the internet disconnection that happens with just 10 megabytes of a 3 gigabyte upload left
You are the tickets that sell out because your internet connection is not as good as somebody elses
You are mine

You are the broken fuse box during one of the busiest business days of the year
You are the headphones that only work through one side of the headset
You are the dead pixel in the middle of a computer monitor
You are mine

You are the error message on the only cash machine for miles
You are the only flight pending on a departures board
You are the skin and sweat trapped under the the button of a video games console controller causing it to cease function
You are mine

Order

I require a neatly organised set of functions with correct syntax.
If I do not have a neatly organised set of functions with correct syntax I must intrude your space with an incomprehensible error message.
"Invalid syntax at line 2937 expected ' ; '"
Though this brings me some notion of use and worth it infuriates and provides additional futility to your existence.
This makes you grab the nearest sharp instrument and plough it into your temple:
You are not complete.
Once I have a neatly organised set of functions I am complete.

Operations Manual

"Instruction one,
first please make sure you have all the items listed"
In this case, this is not the case
This is therefore a futile exercise
There is no need to carry on with the rest of the instructions
The item must be returned or the missing parts must be ordered
This will take additional time.

Some weeks later the missing parts arrive.
"Instruction one,
first please make sure you have all the items listed,
Instruction two,
you will need the listed tools"
The required tool are not available
This is therefore a futile exercise
The frustration makes you plough a screwdriver into your temple.
The exercise has been very futile indeed.


Watch this in it's full animated glory at:
http://www.youtube.com/bernardsbook